One of the worst feelings in the world is knowing you let someone down because you did something stupid.

Le Freak

So remember how Casey and I moved into an apartment? Since moving in, we've gotten some mail for the couple who lived here before us. Usually, it's been bank statements, stuff from Capital One, nothing too thrilling.

But today, we struck gold.

I thought the couple who lived here before us were normal people. We met them when we came over to look at the place and they seemed nice, a little goober-ish, but nice.

FALSE.

I'm not exactly sure how to preface this so I've decided to let the pictures speak for themselves accompanied by some commentary from yours truly.
Note: this is real, I took these pictures myself and nothing has been photo-shopped-the only thing I did was crop the pictures and brightened them so you can see them better. I'm sorry there's so many, but I feel like these needs to be shared.


This is the cover. I'm not sure how to pronounce this, but this is 'The Budk Catalogue'. If you think the cover is good, just you wait, Henry Higgins.


Dragon Ashtray, quite the elegant touch for any living room. in Hell.


This was my first indicator that this magazine was... different. and by different, I mean meant for white supremacists or guys who live in their parents' basements.


I feel soooo much better knowing that these were actually tested in Mekong, like who would buy ass-kicker boots without that assurance? Clearly anyone who buys non-tested in Mekong boots is an idiot.


Am I the only one who sees a phallus-like quality to these?


What the rainbow blade? This was actually the first thing I saw when I opened the magazine and I just laughed. Bless the rainbow blade and all its glory!


This is clearly not Johnny Depp. How insulting.


Needless to say, there are several things upsetting about this item: 1) it's balls. 2) it's a repeat sell-out item, which means people actually buy this. and 3) there's a 2 for $10 offer- WHO NEEDS 2 OF THESE?


Cute cat key chain + something to gouge out people's eyes= every Cat Lady's dream. Priceless.


A Confederate bedspread, a Wolf bedspread, a Wildlife bedspread, and a Tiger bedspread. 80s/90s t-shirt revival.


My favourite part about these little babies is the add: "Stainless steel device locks thumbs so close together that a person will feel foolish at how helpless they are!". I don't know how to say this, but I'm fairly certain that if my thumbs were 'locked together', I think I could still use my other 8 fingers.


at least it's the Union hat that's shown bigger, right?


So much for the Union... (ps- these were next to each other)


"Cool" is a relative term. If I'm in the World of Warcraft office, yes, this is cool. If I'm anywhere else, not so much...


Would these not be the most awesome New Year's Eve drinks? Like seriously, every Orcs dream.


This was my favourite sequence of products. Here, we have a creepy leather scripture case with creep cross on the zipper...


... Which was right next to the Anti-Cross (Would Jesus really have a dagger? No.)...


... Which was right next to these guys. The perfect Religious White Supremacist Sunday accessories.


and last, but certainly not least, the crystal wolf. It's just so elegant and graceful, I can't help myself.


and that was the Adventures in the Budk Catalogue.



I have so many questions for the people who lived here before us.

America's Sweetheart

When I was little, I watched a lot of old television. I've seen every episode of 'I Love Lucy', 'Scooby-Doo', 'The Mary Tyler Moore Show', 'The Dick Van Dyke Show', etc. I don't exactly know how this happened- maybe because my parents trusted TV-land and early morning Cartoon network more than other networks, but whatever the reason, it resulted in an undying love for old-time television (I still am in love with Dyke Van Dyke).

One of my favourites was 'The Golden Girls', not particularly because I love older lady drama, but because I LOVE Betty White. Since I was 8 years old, one of my dreams has been to meet Betty White. I want to be her when I'm old (I also want to be Queenie from 'Larkrise to Candleford', in case you were wondering).

Yesterday, while flipping channels, I came across the AFI Lifetime Achievement Award for Morgan Freeman and there was a introduction by Betty White. and I about died. I think she is easily one of the funniest ladies in Hollywood, and she's just so darn cute! You know if she was your grandma, you would love every minute of your life.

So in honour of my favourite Golden Girl, here are some of my favourite Betty White moments.

Enjoy :)







The AFI Lifetime Achievement Award

Opening Monologue on SNL

SNL Gingey

Superbowl Snicker's Commercial

Betty White on Craig Ferguson (some language, but so funny)

Betty White acceptance speech for the SAG Awards


also, in case you were wondering, Betty White has written a new book called 'If you ask me (and of course you won't) and it's the best.


I just love Betty White :)

Good Things

There's been a lot of good things this week that make me smile.

- THE MAVS WON!!!! WOOOOOOO!!!!!

It's not like I'm a huge Mavs fan or anything, I just think Lebron James is way over-rated, but thank to James, Bill Simmons has been writing some of the funniest articles ever.

- our apartment is mostly done and unpacked and it feels great! I'm the type of person who gets really stressed/bothered by things in boxes so getting the things out of the boxes or up on the walls is great. The only thing we need now is a kitchen table and chairs and we're finished :)

- my sister is going to have her baby soon!! we are very excited to welcome a new little baby girl into our family and I know my sister is done with being pregnant. My nephew, however, may not be as excited- he's been the apple of his parents' eye for the last 3 and 1/2 years so this is going to be quite the adjustment. The other day, he told me that he wouldn't be sad that I was getting married if I promised to love him more than the new baby... He's also proposed that the new baby live at Grandma and Grandpa's house while he lives at Mommy and Daddy's... it's gonna be rough for the little guy.

- today is our 1 month anniversary and it's been the best month of my life. I definitely have married one of the greatest and most amazing people on earth. Funny things that have happened in our first month of marriage:
- bad food poisoning on the honeymoon (this wasn't actually funny, but we got to know each other A LOT better).
- saying the same things at the same time all the time
- knowing what the other person is thinking without them saying it (it's like being married has given us ESP)
- drinking a gallon of chocolatey milk in 2 days.
- eating 2 packs of cookies in 1 day.
- almost hitting a group of quails while driving home (I screamed, 'YOU CAN'T HIT QUAILS' at the top of my lungs, which scared the quails.)
- placing a book shelf somewhere else in our bedroom because we don't want to move our bed (the bed is also blocking what would be a very useful plug in the wall)
- hanging up a picture of Middle Earth and both screaming when it fell down while watching a movie

- Casey won his soccer game tonight and we got Dr. Pepper after- 2 for 1 :)

- Katy Perry came out with a new music video today, 'T.G.I.F.; it's hilarious and makes me love Katy Perry more. Even better is that the video co-stars Rebecca Black. I feel like it's a huge 'IN YOUR FACE' to the world- every one ragged on her because she recorded one of the worst songs in music history and she gets to be in a music video with Katy Perry, which is my dream (second to being in a Kanye West music video). Touche, Rebecca Black, touche. Here's a link if you're interested in watching: http://www.vevo.com/watch/katy-perry/last-friday-night-tgif/USCA31100045

- Our dear friends Brigham and Jess got the apartment kitty corner (and up a level) from ours, which means we'll be neighbours and we'll have friends!! we're excited for them to come live by us in August :)

- our fish, Jaws, is eating and it makes me happy to know he's not going to starve to death. I've also tried feeding him bits of people food, just to see what happens- so far, he likes cheese, but doesn't like bread or oats.

- we own all of the Toy Story's :)

- My friend Emily comes home this week from her mission in Argentina and I'm very excited to see her.

- we merged bank accounts this week, which was one of those, 'yeah, we're married' steps in life. I liked it :)

and that's everything I can think of right now. I still don't have a job, which makes life really boring and stresses me out, but I'm looking and I have faith that something will work out. If anyone knows any recommendations, they're greatly appreciated :)

So. Tonight. We went to the Temple.





Also, The Mavericks won game 5.




I'm not saying there's a connection.

But.

I do wish the Temple was open this Sunday.

At least, there's Church.




GO MAVS!!!!!!!!!!

Put Me Down

I had an experience today that made me wonder if I'm living my life the way I want to. It starts with a confession: we went to J-Dawgs. for the 3rd time this week. It's clear we have an addiction (J-Dawgs also as Dr. Pepper- it's like I get my 2 fixes every time I go. no good). But that's not what this is about.

So we're in J-Dawgs, we order and walk down the line like standard protocol and behind us was a family of 7. For those of you unfamiliar with J-Dawgs (I'm sad for you), you have to wait a little while for the hot dogs to cook and sometimes, they call things in the order of the hot dog type being cooked (beef or polish) and not the order you are in line. Casey got his dog first (polish) and usually mine would be next, but they did all the polish dogs next, which belonged to the family behind us.
So they go through about 4 polish dogs and a beef dog comes up, which is mine. However, the lady behind me (who was now next to me), turned and very sharply said, 'My order isn't finished. That isn't yours. I will finish my order'. I was very surprised by her mean response and told the poor guy at the counter that I'd wait until their order was finished at my seat (he looked so uncomfortable because he knew that was my hot dog too, but was just as intimidated of this woman as I was).

For whatever reason, this lady's actions really pissed me off. like seriously. I went over to Casey and fumed about her for a good 10 minutes. I hate being pushed around by people who think they are better, bigger and louder than me and this lady had all three going for her. She knew I wouldn't say anything because I'm a small girl who wouldn't say anything. This isn't the first time this has happened in my life and I think it comes with the territory of my personality- I don't like confrontation and it's easier just to let people be jerks than to start something and get it done my way. I really wanted to go up to the lady while she was seated and tell her that I know that blasted hot dog was mine and that she was wrong to push me around, but I didn't.

And that's why I'm writing. Should I have approached that lady and told her she was wrong? or was it better to leave it as it was? Like I said, I hate being pushed around and I hate it when people don't respect me because they think they're better than I am and undeserving of their respect. But then I wonder if telling this lady that she was completely rude and a beezy would do anything because she wouldn't listen to me anyways and I would just be stooping to her level (and then another part of me laughs because this is all about a hot dog... but it is a J-Dawg, which is clearly superior to the average hot dog).
Obviously there are times in life when you need to be assertive and need to tell people what's up, but where's the line between letting people be push-overs and keeping your self-respect? It just made me wonder if I should be more assertive instead of passive and fuming about it later in private. I mean, anyone who knows me knows I'm a very expressive person, but when push comes to shove, I frequently back down, don't say what I'm really thinking and let the other person throw the stones. It's like I don't know how to find a balance. With J-Dawg Beezy, maybe I should have approached her later and just told her firmly that she was wrong and rude to me, and left it at that. But who knows what kinds of problems that could have caused.
I don't know- the point is I don't want to be trampled anymore, but I don't want to trample. I just need to find the balance.

in happier news, we went over to Ben and Alex's tonight and had lots of fun eating pizza, playing 'Battle of the Sexes', which I swear was rigged, and watching Youtube videos. I also spent a good portion of it coveting their dog, Mocha, and laughing with good friends. We had an excellent time and I'm excited for the next time we all get to hang out.

Our fish, Jaws, hasn't eaten in 2 days and I can't tell if he doesn't like his food (I can't say I blame him...) or if he's just adapting to a new environment. It's freaking me out either way and I wish he would stop it. Why can't he eat like the fish on my blog, dangit.

My best friend, Mary, is engaged and I'm so happy for her!!!! I get to go home for the wedding in July and it's going to be a blast. and hopefully they'll come live by us in the fall.

Still no job, which is kind of stressing me out, but I've just got to put my head down and power through. and pray a ton and apply for everything I can.

Happy Sabbath to you all :)

c'est la vie

There are a lot of things I want to/should write about because it's been a little while and life has been pretty exciting as of late (say hello to the new Mrs. Greer- it's a little weird to see in writing, but I'm loving every minute of it). But. This.has.to.come.first.

So we got married. and with marriage comes presents. For the most part, we got a pretty good haul, not too many things we didn't register for, nothing too weird and it was nice to be able to take most of the stuff we didn't want and get monies for it (hey there, $700+ for Target). However. there's always a rogue gift. and our rogue gift is from Hell.

But first, a story: Once upon a time, Casey served a mission in Tulsa Oklahoma. and after said mission, Casey decided to live with some of his mission companions/people who served in his mission. In theory, this was an excellent idea. In practice, not so much. For privacy sake, we shall call one of these companions 'Cheap 'N Tacky'. Now, we didn't know that Cheap 'N Tacky was cheap and tacky until we got married, but we did know after spending about 10 minutes with him that Cheap 'N Tacky likes to talk about himself. a lot.

Anyways, back to our story. Cheap 'N Tacky got married the same day we did (May 14th :) and came with his new bride to our open house here in Utah. We said hello to them in line, everything was cheery and there was no mention of The Gift.
Later that evening, Casey and I started opening our gifts and were having a jolly old time until we opened the present from Cheap 'N Tacky.

The first sign this was going to be bad was the card, featured below.

Yes, my friends, this is a used card. Cheap 'N Tacky ripped out what was written to him and his wife, wrote a note to use on the left side and tried to make it look okay by writing, 'ps- I'm not sure what happened to the card...'.
So this is bad, right? and I thought after opening the card that maybe they were just trying to be funny (even though their note gives no indication of such) and they would make up for their tacky-ness with a nice gift.

No. No.No.No.No.No.No.No.No.No.No.

This was the present. WARNING: the following image is sinful and formerly belonged to Satan.




Where to begin? This thing is awful and straight out of Satan's kitchen. and sadly, it looks worse in the box than on the outside. From the classy price tag in the top right corner to the small piece of tape with gift wrap still attached (not pictured), this thing easily takes the cake of the worst gift I've ever gotten, which is saying a lot because my Grandma Long was notorious for giving bad gifts. Where the heck did they get this thing? Who makes this? Why do they make this? Doesn't Satan miss his cookie jar? WHO EVEN LIKES CAMPBELL'S TOMATO SOUP? WTF?
and more importantly, who gives this as a wedding gift? I mean, I could understand if close friends of ours had given it as a gag gift, but also gave us/did something nice, but Cheap 'N Tacky? I would have preferred the $2.75 they may or may not have spent of the bag and tissue paper (it was hard to determine if that too was used) than this. W.T.F.

However, there is a silver lining. Initially, I didn't know what to do with it. I felt too guilty to give it to D.I. and throwing it away just didn't seem like it would give me the satisfaction I needed. So solution: we told dear friends of ours about this gift and guess what their newest hobby is?

shooting.

we've been wanting to go with them for months and now, I have more motivation to go than ever. To be able to shoot this sinful piece of junk will give more satisfaction than words can express. Thank you Jill and Woody. I could kiss you both.

So that's that. Sometimes, life is just funny and you have to laugh, you know?

In other news, married life is great. I've never been happier.

and we bought a fish!! His name is Jaws and I love him. here's a picture so you can love him too.



and now, to play Halo Reach with Casey. I love spouse bonding time :)