Rushin' Headlong

I have a lot of random thoughts swimming around in my head so I figure I need to spit them out somewhere so I can get some sleep tonight.

- apartment shopping is no bueno. we've been looking for a place FOR.EV.ER. and just when we think we've got one, it's sold to someone else. right now, there's a place we really really like and we're in a good position to get it- I'm praying with a lot of energy we do because not having a place to live makes me anxious.

- General Conference was amazing- i was really impressed by the theme of service and it's interesting because i've been thinking a lot lately about what i can do to be more useful in the world and i've been wanting to do things. now, i have a command to do them, which gives me more motivation. i also really liked the talk about tithing because it's a principle of the Gospel that i've never really tested or applied full-heartedly to my life. but i want to and i will :) and President Uchdorf's jokes about planes and aviation just make me smile. we're guided by such wonderful, good and inspired people :)

- my apartment has this weird smell, something like old eggs, brown, and mop water. i wish i were kidding. i'm very excited to be going home soon. seriously.

- we bought an N64 last weekend and Super Smash Bros. needless to say, i feel this is the best thing i've invested in all semester.

- the invitations are here! and we have to send them out to peoples. and that's exciting :)

- i have to write a 14 page thesis paper for my Humanities 420R class- i haven't started. and this time, our papers are being submitted to a board of Humanities teachers to be read. why couldn't that have happened last semester when i wrote one of my best papers yet or more importantly, when i had more motivation?

- i watched Tangled twice this weekend. i really really love that movie. it makes me happy and laugh and i just feel good. thanks Disney for giving the princess movies another go. although someone told me it's the last princess movie they're doing for a while. i hope not.


- sometimes i feel like i'm a bad friend and family member. i feel like i'm selfish and can't get past my own problems to help those around me. i let my life and stresses get in the way. i need to be better about that.

- birth control does NOT make your cramps better; whoever told me that was very clearly lying. thank goodness for my heating pad and chocolatey milk.

- a little while ago, i wrote a blog about this song that i'm in love with by katy perry called 'E.T' feat. kanye west. the music video came out last week and i can't tell if i like it or not. it's weird- i keep watching it, trying to decide if i like it and sometimes i don't but then other times, i do. it's weird. here's the link if you're interested: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5Sd5c4o9UM

- my mom is the greatest and most amazing person i know. i really love and miss my mommy and i'm excited to see her in 2 weeks.

- i think i have an addiction to Jdawgs. i believe it's in the secret sauce, which i suspect is laced with meth or cocaine. since last thursday, i've been to Jdawgs 4 times. this has got to stop.

- i want to go to the beach and lay in the sand and have that feeling of warmth all over.

- we're thinking of getting smart phones for a new plan through Sprint, but can't decide if we want them or not. i'm scared of new technology, but if it's more cost efficient and full of awesome features, we should do it right? but it all depends if we have internet where we move to. either way, i'm in for a new phone, which is exciting as my phone resents me and won't let people call me anymore.

- speaking of technology, i got a new computer. Lula finally gave up the ghost... well mostly, i think she can be fixed but my dad wants a computer and my parents offered to buy me a new one so i opted for that. it's another macbook and i love it, i haven't named it yet, but i'm sure something will come.

- i'm writing this other paper for my English class about Cormac McCarthy's novel, 'The Road' and i'm relating the characters to the Holy Family and the changing of the role of the Virgin Mary. i regret not starting this paper earlier because the topic really interests me. i also can't decide if i liked the book or not. it's so sad and i'm a bit of an optimist so i have a hard time with sad literature. would i recommend it to people? hard to say... i also want to see the movie, but it's rated R. moral decision time...

- something i'm excited about is having all these sticky notes on my computer desktop go away because it means that the semester is over, i'm married, we have a place to live, i've bought music from iTunes and it's summer :)

- i have to register for classes at UVU tomorrow night- i'm kinda excited, but i'm not really sure why. maybe because it's something new. i'm excited for the new.

- i'm on my last Redwall book as Brian Jacques passed away a little over a month ago. this makes me sad. i've grown up on these books and Jacques has been writing them all through my life, what'll i do when i finish this last one? i just love these books :)






- one of my friends on facebook has the same wedding dress as i do and she looks stunning in it- i only hope i can look half as good as she does :)

and i think that's everything.

good night all, sweet dreams :)

ready and waiting

I'm ready to leave.
I'm ready to get out of here.
I'm ready to get married.
I'm ready to leave behind the things that keep nagging and pulling.
I'm ready to forget the upsets and bad things.
I'm ready for a new life. cuz this one is gettin' old fast.

only 4 weeks left.

I'm ready for the end.

Guetta Blaster

Statement: it's hard not to love nerdy French men who are DJs and Kelly Rowland.

I was listening to Pandora today (the Lady Gaga station- it's good, real good) and the song, "Sexy Chick" by David Guetta feat. Akon came on (apparently it also has a little more colourful name, but that's what Pandora called it so I'm going with Pandora). I'm sure you've all heard this song (here's the link in case you haven't: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTwzU826qD4 - favourite line: I'm tryin' to find ways to describe this girl without bein' disrespectful. Thanks Akon. also, minor language- you've been warned). And I danced in my chair a bit while writing my Roman paper.

Anyways,it sparked my interest to Wikipedia David Guetta to see who he is and what other songs he's written. Turns out the guy's way awesome- he helped write/produce Black Eyed Peas' "I Gotta Feelin", which is one of my favourite jams of all time. He's French, which is cool because everyone rags on the French and he's a gem to be proud of. He's worked and produced with a bunch of people, including Jennifer Lopez, Fergie, Madonna, Lil' Wayne (MY.HERO.), Flo Rida, Chris Willis, Taio Cruz and Rihanna. He's won a bunch of awards from all over the globe. He did a cool cover of David Bowie's "Heroes". And he's just super great.

I know I'm about 2 years late, but in my search of all things David Guetta, I found this song. and I'm in love. It's called 'When Love Takes Over' featuring Kelly Rowland. and it's beautiful. I love it because it's happy, makes me want to dance around and really shows how powerful Kelly Rowland's voice is, enough to make you wonder why she hasn't been as popular as Beyonce. Here's a link to the video (he's the smiley guy pushing around the DJ equipment). There's kinda a weird underwater bit, some glimpses of a hott make-out and this guy with fire thingies... just remember you're listening more than watching.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QxPrbhmci4A

I love the high five at the end.

I <3 David Guetta.

Love Isn't Easy

I sometimes keep track of my weeks in terms of how many large Dr. Peppers I drink from Wendys or McDonalds; today is Thursday and my count is up to 6. Tonight is the first night I don't feel like I NEED a Dr. Pepper to survive, although it would still be nice to have one.
This blog isn't about my addiction to Dr. Pepper though. It's about lessons learned and the value of love.

Aside from my icky Roman art history test, this week has been an emotional breakdown that was mostly solved by a 4 hour nap today and is now okay to digest. I don't need to go in to detail, but the basic sum-up is this: I was deeply offended by someone close to me, who also was offended by something I had said, and we had a blow out yesterday. I'm not one who is pro-contention; I frequently avoid talking to people until I'm ready to confront them in a more calm way because I have a nasty tongue and it can easily get the better of me.
So yesterday was the day I finally felt like I could talk to the person and it didn't go how I thought it was going to. at all. and after talking to this person, I felt awful. really awful. and I cried for about 23 minutes. and then went to my Roman review. it wasn't a good day.

Since yesterday, I've been trying to figure out what I need to learn from this so that it won't happen again and so I know what to do in case it does. and the answer is this: love them anyway.
One of my favourite writings is by Dr. Kent M. Keith called 'The Paradoxical Commandments'. (Mother Teresa also had a similar set of commandments). I feel that a few of them are pertinent:

1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway...

4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway...

8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.
9. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.
10. Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.

Sometimes it's really hard to love people, especially when they've done you wrong. It's easy to focus on their faults, to find their weaknesses and expose them to get back at them or teach them a lesson, to think the worst of them because it makes you feel better. I've done all these things, some quite recently, and I realized yesterday that I can't keep doing this.
There are some people in this world who just need to be loved. They might not show you love and reject you with harsh words, but they still need to be loved. These people probably aren't going to change and that's something they're going to have to deal with on their own terms. but they still need to be loved and have compassion shown to them. If I focus on all the things that drive me nuts, the things that hurt, the things that make me angry, or the things that I feel like I need to teach this person, I'm going to go crazy and my blood is going to be 90% Dr. Pepper, neither of which are good results. I have to love them anyway.

We have a phrase in my family that comes from the tv show 'Malcolm in the Middle' and my dad says it any time someone gets mad. 'Let it go, Lois'. Sometimes we just have to let it go. and love them.
and that's the right thing to do.

i think this is funny. i don't like miley cyrus a ton. but i love kenan thompson. a lot.

enjoy :)

http://www.hulu.com/watch/221674/saturday-night-live-disney-channel-acting-school

also, I'm in love with this song. it's not entirely wholesome, but I think it's beautiful. I freaking love Katy Perry and Kanye West.


Katy Perry feat. Kanye West: 'E.T'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jkthJOeNywQ

So Sorry

If you're breathing, you've heard about Brandon Davies in the last few days.
If you're holding your breath, this is what happened: Davies was kicked off the BYU basketball team because of an Honour Code violation and will no longer be playing in the tournament and could possibly be expelled from the University.
And needless to say, people have been in a bit of an uproar about it. The announcement was made yesterday and I've heard about it in each class, between each class and on ESPN*.

Granted, I'm not a BYU fan, but I don't hate them either. I'm a little sad and it's not because BYU chances of winning the National #1 title have gone down a ton; I think the mark of a truly great team is being able to pull it together after unexpected problems arise and I think BYU has that potential. They're an amazing team, they deserved their win against State last weekend and I think they have the skill and the chemistry to work together and take this. I hope they do, I really do.

Here's why I'm sad: Brandon Davies will forever have a tarnished reputation. I'm not trying to pardon him for what happened- he knew full well when he signed the Honour Code what was expected of him if he played at BYU and it is his fault that he disobeyed those expectations. But this does not make him a bad person.

We're all human. We all make mistakes. Very few of us enjoy the spotlight so when we do falter, our mistakes aren't broadcasted to the world. However, when you step into the lime light and trip, everyone sees and everyone knows. What normally is a private affair taken care of with very few people is publicized, gossiped, and criticized by many.
As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and Christians, I don't think it's our job to assume what happened and point fingers. We don't have the right to know what happened nor judge what we think happened; that's not our place. "He that is without sin amoung you, let him first cast a stone" (John 8:7). I'm not without sin, I sin daily- I can't be angry with Davies for something that I'm just as guilty of. I can be upset at the outcome, but I can't blame him because he's human just like me.

Good luck Davies. I hope things turn for the best, I really do.


* ESPN was really good about this, I was pleasantly surprised. Instead of ragging on BYU for the strict Honour Code, they supported BYU, calling it 'refreshing' that students are held accountable to good and clean living. They commended the school for their choice of action and that, though unfortunate, they admired BYU for holding to their expectations and encouraging students to be honest, good people.

This is the discussion: http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=6174077