Love Isn't Easy

I sometimes keep track of my weeks in terms of how many large Dr. Peppers I drink from Wendys or McDonalds; today is Thursday and my count is up to 6. Tonight is the first night I don't feel like I NEED a Dr. Pepper to survive, although it would still be nice to have one.
This blog isn't about my addiction to Dr. Pepper though. It's about lessons learned and the value of love.

Aside from my icky Roman art history test, this week has been an emotional breakdown that was mostly solved by a 4 hour nap today and is now okay to digest. I don't need to go in to detail, but the basic sum-up is this: I was deeply offended by someone close to me, who also was offended by something I had said, and we had a blow out yesterday. I'm not one who is pro-contention; I frequently avoid talking to people until I'm ready to confront them in a more calm way because I have a nasty tongue and it can easily get the better of me.
So yesterday was the day I finally felt like I could talk to the person and it didn't go how I thought it was going to. at all. and after talking to this person, I felt awful. really awful. and I cried for about 23 minutes. and then went to my Roman review. it wasn't a good day.

Since yesterday, I've been trying to figure out what I need to learn from this so that it won't happen again and so I know what to do in case it does. and the answer is this: love them anyway.
One of my favourite writings is by Dr. Kent M. Keith called 'The Paradoxical Commandments'. (Mother Teresa also had a similar set of commandments). I feel that a few of them are pertinent:

1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway...

4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway...

8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.
9. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.
10. Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.

Sometimes it's really hard to love people, especially when they've done you wrong. It's easy to focus on their faults, to find their weaknesses and expose them to get back at them or teach them a lesson, to think the worst of them because it makes you feel better. I've done all these things, some quite recently, and I realized yesterday that I can't keep doing this.
There are some people in this world who just need to be loved. They might not show you love and reject you with harsh words, but they still need to be loved. These people probably aren't going to change and that's something they're going to have to deal with on their own terms. but they still need to be loved and have compassion shown to them. If I focus on all the things that drive me nuts, the things that hurt, the things that make me angry, or the things that I feel like I need to teach this person, I'm going to go crazy and my blood is going to be 90% Dr. Pepper, neither of which are good results. I have to love them anyway.

We have a phrase in my family that comes from the tv show 'Malcolm in the Middle' and my dad says it any time someone gets mad. 'Let it go, Lois'. Sometimes we just have to let it go. and love them.
and that's the right thing to do.